Life, love, loss
26 February 2007
Warning: This is probably going to be a completely random and rather heavy post.
So with so much time to think about things lately and sick of talking to people about it I thought I would write my thoughts down. And well just putting them into a Word document wasn't going to be good enough. So...
When I am going to meet someone who I can spend the rest of my life with? What do I really want to do with my life? Am I chronically going to choose an emotionally unavailable guy to spend my time with? How can I help her? What does it all really mean? Will I be able to fulfill all my dreams before it is too late?
So many questions no need to have answers, even though I want them.
The other day when confronted with the possibility of losing it all tomorrow I realized that even though next week could suck, today is what is most important. It is so hard to live for the moment, when life does take planning, but really what if everything for the next 10 years was planned and it was all ripped away in a moment. All that time you spent worrying about a plan would be for not.
So no more thinking about the ifs, ands or buts and just think about what is.
As I am confronted with choices, decisions, desires it seems clear that if I truly believe that everything happens for a reason then I will let it happen.
Who knows I might just enjoy things more!!!
So with so much time to think about things lately and sick of talking to people about it I thought I would write my thoughts down. And well just putting them into a Word document wasn't going to be good enough. So...
When I am going to meet someone who I can spend the rest of my life with? What do I really want to do with my life? Am I chronically going to choose an emotionally unavailable guy to spend my time with? How can I help her? What does it all really mean? Will I be able to fulfill all my dreams before it is too late?
So many questions no need to have answers, even though I want them.
The other day when confronted with the possibility of losing it all tomorrow I realized that even though next week could suck, today is what is most important. It is so hard to live for the moment, when life does take planning, but really what if everything for the next 10 years was planned and it was all ripped away in a moment. All that time you spent worrying about a plan would be for not.
So no more thinking about the ifs, ands or buts and just think about what is.
As I am confronted with choices, decisions, desires it seems clear that if I truly believe that everything happens for a reason then I will let it happen.
Who knows I might just enjoy things more!!!
